Back from the Dead...or from the living. Either way I am back...maybe

I think that I have been trying to avoid putting thought to blog for awhile as I am super busy with life. BUT I have realized again how cathartic it can be.

There is a verse in Proverbs 16:24-Gracious words are a honeycomb, sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

I am not a fan of tearing others down or lavishing unearned praise. But when these pinup photos came out, I was so horrified at how I looked. I ripped myself to shreds. I was angry that I spent the money and that I looked the way I did. I pored over each one and was critical in thought and word. I was livid that I had tried something new and fell flat on my face or so I thought. I was embarrassed and mad at myself for acting like a typical "girl" and berating myself. I finally told my husband how I felt and you know what? He went and pored over each one with his artist's eye and chose about thirty. He then gave me the list and said now you find the ones from there that you like. I realized that he loved me just the way I was and just the way I looked in those photos. He was so excited that I had taken the initiative and done something I had always wanted to do.

This is just a small picture of how God loves each of us. He loves us no matter what we look like or act like. There is a grace extended that we fail to see. I read The Silver Chair to Caedmon and in the last chapter, Aslan walks up to the two children, who were thinking all these thoughts of how they had failed him again and again. He kisses them and says "I will not always be scolding you. You have done the work I intended for you. Enough with that and follow me."

I hope to write with gracious words in the effort to not allow bitterness to take root. Bitterness has stolen many days from me but not any longer. There is an ideal in my head that when not attained paves the way for me to tear myself down and that is where I struggle. So I hope to have this blog be a safe haven where I can be honest but still be gracious-to others and to myself.

That is why I am starting back up with writing. To extend the grace to myself. What is that phrase? 20% grace. Give myself 20% grace.

So True Little Sister So True

"Never allow the possibility of failure to stop you from reaching your objectives. When you have a strong belief in your actions and desire to succeed nothing can stop you."

So I am sitting here getting ready for bed and I am thinking oh I need to check my dashboard to see what my people have been up to. Facebook is wonderful for that instant rush of information and all but something about people's blogs make it seem more intimate. Anyway, I check my sister's blog and she has this quote. It is inspired from an Abraham Lincoln quote but I am stealing it because it so applies to our lives right now.

We are facing so many changes and the direction in which we are headed seems to contrary to what the world would have us do that we look almost a little crazy but I can honestly say nothing has excited me as much or terrified me as much as where we are headed. Wow was that not just about the longest run on sentence ever. :) So here goes, our plan (and it is our plan for my wonderful and amazing husband has been consulting me on this whole process) is to leave the Navy. OMG! I know here we are the biggest diggits ever and we are leaving. Well Rick is technically but really we both would be. I am so familiar with this world that it is going to be a HUGE adjustment. 

Now that I have made that announcement the baby has taken the cue to start crying. Tomorrow will be an explanation of why we are making this choice and what we will be doing with our crazy selves after all this. :) 

new baby new life new chapter new direction

So this is our life now. We no longer have picture of an odd number but a nice even 4 and as Rick says we have evenly added to the population. I am writing this while being interrupted repeatedly by a crying baby and my 5 year old requesting help on his monthly book project that we waited til today to do. :) So yes my life is hectic but I am happy and looking forward to how our family will continue to grow closer and more rich with this new little girl we have! So yea for Charlotte! And I am sorry it has taken almost a year to write! Will try and keep it back up! 

I realized that I had not written in a good long while. It has been a little busy here in the land of the palm tree. But here is a sampling of some of the pics from Singapore. We had a great time and obviously Caedmon loved being with his daddy. I will update another day but we are on the downward slope of this deployment and looking forward to when we can pick up our missing family member and be complete again. It has been a blessing to have email back up and regular communication once again. I missed that so much. Rick has been so good about including Caedmon in all our correspondence. So Caedmon has his own section in each email just for him. Until next time, Aloha!

Well needless to say it has been awhile since I last blogged. I need an hour or so to do this justice and I am not doing that.
We have had visitors aplenty and just came back from a wonderful trip in which, you guessed it, we saw Rick. It was wonderful and everything one can hope for. I am so happy that we decided to shell out the money for it and go ahead and visit somewhere new and exciting. Rick had a great time and we are still trying to get it through our heads it was real and not a dream.
Now that we are back, reality is sinking in and all the things I need to do before the week is out are creeping in. I am already up to my ears in my lists and I just got home yesterday. Oh well...that is life I guess.
Caedmon loved seeing his Daddy. And now that I look back, I wish I would have thought to take out my camera when they reunited; but I was so tired and overwhelmed with it all, all I could do was smile and cry and be happy. Caedmon was instantly in his Daddy's arms and Rick was just glad to be holding him again.
I am so going to cherish the touch of my husband's hand in mine and seeing his arms holding our child. I think this will sustain all three of us to make it through the next few months. With the Lord's help and our own determination (and loads of friends), we should be just fine.
I am looking forward to going to church again tomorrow and celebrating Jesus and what He did for me and for each of us. My heart is glad again and I owe it to the Lord who had blessed us with the funds and the time to do the things we are doing. Now if only I can take some more time to spend in the Word and start shoring up for my new role as mom of two, life would be near perfect.

Long time, no blog!

Grandma Debbie and Caedmon at Haunama Bay next to the humuhumunukunukuapua'a
Caedmon at the zoo inside the koi fish tunnel, obviously having fun!
Meeting Grandma and Papa at the airport. We gave them leis in their fave colors!
At Duke's with Papa on his birthday! Happy Birthday Papa!

Just a quick photo update of my visit with my parents.
Thought you would all enjoy it!
I may be absent again for a few weeks but believe me when I get back, I will be back with a blogging vengeance!

So here is Caedmon.
He is very proud of his muddy pants.
He never gets dirty but on this day we went hiking in the rain forest.
Where it rains a lot and it gets muddy!
So we were hiking back down the mountain and we both slipped.
Mommy fell and almost landed on him
But he caught himself on some rocks and landed on his butt.
So here are the results of that day:
A muddy but very HAPPY little boy!
All that a mom could ask for!
He had great fun being the line leader
And showing Mommy the best way to go and to hike
Since he is the resident expert in our house at the moment.
According to himself!
And that is all for today!